Brazil

Made with four spoons rather than five – why? – who knows. The result though felt like a five spooner – dark and strong. There was big contrast between the pale froth and the super dark coffee beneath which just made you want to pick up that mug and get your face in it. Next time we’ll try a five spooner  and see if we can survive it. Judges Rating - 7/10

These Brazil beans are big and dusty - they look like they've been bleached out in the sun. Once ground they are very light in colour and that made us nervous. This one looked weak.

And so it proved - no matter how much we spooned this one up we couldn't get the kick we needed from it. What this coffee is, is light and refreshing. Now, that's not something we Judges crave in a coffee - if we want light and refreshing we'll knock up a big jug of Pimms. The flavour is definitely a bit nutty though - which is what they say on the packet too. So - most normal coffee drinkers I expect would love this one - it does exactly what it says on the tin, so we can't really fault the Brown Bear boys on it. But for us it's just too wimpy. 6/10

I've never been a fan of liquid prunes early in the morning, but that's what this coffee promises. Not only that, but served over a bed of nuts. Despite all this bad-boy fruit name dropping - this is actually a nice coffee to slurp down. I made one for an unsuspecting guest yesterday afternoon and spooned it up big time. He was last seen driving at 120mph down the hard shoulder of the M3 before. So, it can deliver on punch. The only thing we'd say is it can be a bit dry tasting. Not a real thirst quencher. No real extraordinary flavours showed through to us - which seems pretty typical of a Brazilian. (7/10)

    This has restored our faith in the Grumpy Mule - and Latin coffee - which for us lately just never seem as good as the Africans. We've had a few of these - and there's been no cock ups on any of them. Easy to make and forgiving on that early Monday morning shaking hand that could so easily over-egg it. Anyway - there aren't really any adjectives or metaphors to describe this - no "fruity"or "zesty" required. It's just a good old coffee-tasting mug that makes you realise that you will never drink instant coffee for as long as you live. They claim "nutty" and "chocolatty" which is just their marketing department talking utter bollocks. There's nothing to say except - it's f*cking great: get some. (9/10)

We love the packaging on these Climpson coffees - they look like they've been bagged out there on the farm. Nothing fancy - just a brown paper bag and label with some better than usual blurb - plus the date is was actually roasted - the 6th Jan in this case. "Plunger lovers in mind" eh? Let's get plunging! Well, it does taste different - somehow it just tastes fresh. Is that because it actually is, or because we read the date on it and it just makes us feel that we're getting something hot from the oven? The taste is super-fragrant - and quite mild. Even after cranking this up an extra spoon, it still didn't get any stronger - it's one to be enjoyed with less milk and less sugar than you might normally have. One to savor rather than kick you up the arse first thing in the morning. 8/10 - only marked down for it's mildness. 

This is a real punchy little Whittard. It's a strength 5, and it tastes it - don't give this one to your mum thinking you can dumb it down and it'll all be ok, because it won't. The smell off the freshly brewed cup is powerful and enticing - there's no way you can forget this one and leave it to go cold by mistake. In fact, I never even put the cup down. 8/10